It is becoming reality
Today is the memorial service. On my way to work I just started to cry. Yesterday I just wanted to cry. We did once. And then there was a realization last night that we were out at dinner but we weren't ALL at dinner. Cathy wasn't at dinner with us.
I held back the tears but I was thinking.. this is where I had my b'day dinner with Cathy and she ordered what I ordered (Steak with Lobster tail). And we were sitting where we sat when she was here.
Yesterday, We put together a picture poster. We did three at my house. I couldn't believe how much we missed out on by having her so far away. Chelle had said how she was jealous when Ginny and I used to spend a week each summer in California. But seeing all the pictures, I was the jealous one. She won't be here for my wedding or children (if that should happen). Or even for graduation next year.
Even the annual call on my Gotsha Day. When she called to let me know that I am special.
Thanksgiving will be here soon, and then Christmas. She won't be here, no cards, we won't receive 'the perfect gift'.
It is getting harder.
It gets harder then easier, right?
I held back the tears but I was thinking.. this is where I had my b'day dinner with Cathy and she ordered what I ordered (Steak with Lobster tail). And we were sitting where we sat when she was here.
Yesterday, We put together a picture poster. We did three at my house. I couldn't believe how much we missed out on by having her so far away. Chelle had said how she was jealous when Ginny and I used to spend a week each summer in California. But seeing all the pictures, I was the jealous one. She won't be here for my wedding or children (if that should happen). Or even for graduation next year.
Even the annual call on my Gotsha Day. When she called to let me know that I am special.
Thanksgiving will be here soon, and then Christmas. She won't be here, no cards, we won't receive 'the perfect gift'.
It is getting harder.
It gets harder then easier, right?
posted by Patti at 5:13 AM
1 Comments:
I sure hope that it gets easier. The holidays will be real tough this year. I am so thankful for my family and friends, and Cathy's, I know that will help us get though this tough time.
We will never forget her, but in time we will be able to remember the good times, instead of these sad ones.
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